Finding a therapist is exhausting.

That's why we vet therapists for you.

Find a vetted therapist
April 2, 2024

Toxic Mother Daughter Relationship Quiz

Kristie Plantinga
young white woman rests her head on her knees looking concerned; toxic mother daughter relationship quiz
April 2, 2024
5 min to read
Show table of contents

We're told that the relationship between a mother and daughter is supposed to be an unbreakable bond of unconditional love and support. 

However, for many women, this relationship is a source of deep pain, resentment, and emotional turmoil. If your mother has been demeaning, manipulative, or outright emotionally abusive, it can negatively impact your self-worth, mental health, and sense of peace. 

You may love your mother deeply while also recognizing that the way she behaves and treats you is toxic and unacceptable. The constant criticism, mind games, and lack of boundaries have likely left you feeling unloved, anxious, and questioning your own reality.

Please know that you are not alone and that you deserve a healthy, loving relationship with your mother. This short quiz can provide some helpful insight into whether your mother-daughter dynamic has become unhealthily toxic. 

No matter the results, resources are provided for counseling and support as you start to set boundaries, regain your voice, and heal from potential emotional trauma.

How accurate is this quiz?

At Best Therapists, we believe that online mental health quizzes can be an excellent first step towards improving our mental health. Quizzes like this one can educate you and provide opportunities for self-reflection, but note that they are not a substitute for professional assessments and diagnoses.

Take our quiz below ↓

Your privacy is important to us, so all results are completely anonymous and no email is required.

Toxic mom: Scenarios of unhealthy behavior towards a grown daughter

Here are some examples to consider if you suspect your mom might be exhibiting toxic behavior toward you as an adult.

Scenario 1 → The guilt trip queen

  • The situation: You make a decision your mom disagrees with, like declining a visit or setting boundaries.
  • The toxic twist: Your mom uses guilt trips to manipulate you. She might make passive-aggressive comments about being a bad daughter, threaten emotional withdrawal, or play the victim to make you feel responsible for her happiness.

Scenario 2 → The boundary-stomper

  • The situation: You share personal details about your life, relationship, or finances.
  • The toxic twist: Your mom disregards your boundaries. She might offer unsolicited advice, criticize your choices, or constantly pry for information, leaving you feeling unheard and disrespected.

Scenario 3 → The emotional blackmailer

  • The situation: You need emotional support during a difficult time.
  • The toxic twist: Your mom minimizes your feelings, compares your situation to her own struggles, or uses the opportunity to make you feel responsible for her emotional well-being. This emotional manipulation hinders your ability to process your own struggles.

Scenario 4 → The "just joking" minimizer

  • The situation: Your mom makes hurtful comments about your appearance, choices, or achievements.
  • The toxic twist: She dismisses your concerns by saying she was "just joking" or gaslights you by making you question your own perception. This minimizes your feelings and erodes your self-esteem.

Scenario 5 → The competitive critic

  • The situation: You achieve a personal goal or celebrate a milestone.
  • The toxic twist: Instead of celebrating your success, your mom subtly competes with you. She might brag about her own achievements, downplay yours, or make critical comments disguised as concern. This robs you of a sense of accomplishment.

Remember: These are just a few examples. If your mom consistently exhibits toxic behaviors that leave you feeling emotionally drained, manipulated, or questioning your self-worth, it's important to prioritize your well-being. Consider setting boundaries, seeking therapy, or limiting contact if necessary. You deserve healthy and supportive relationships.

Need more answers?

Frequently asked questions

Start Getting help from a vetted therapist

Get help for toxic relationships from a therapist.

Written by
Kristie Plantinga

Kristie Plantinga is the founder of Best Therapists. Along with being on the client-side of therapy, Kristie has had the honor of working directly with therapists in her marketing agency for therapists, TherapieSEO. While working alongside therapists, she learned about the inequities in our mental health system that therapists face on a daily basis, and she wanted to do something about it. That’s why Best Therapists is a platform designed to benefit not only therapy-seekers, but therapy providers. Kristie has a Masters degree in Written Communication and a Bachelors degree in Psychology and Music.

Reviewed by
Katelyn McMahon
Registered Psychotherapist, VT #097.0134200

Katelyn is a therapist-turned-writer with a passion for mental health. She has a Master's degree in Social Work from the University of England and is a Registered Psychotherapist in the state of Vermont. Katelyn has professional experience in aging care, addiction treatment, integrated health care, and private practice settings. She also has lived experience being on the client side of therapy. Currently, Katelyn is a content writer who’s passionate about spreading mental health awareness and helping other therapists and therapy-seekers Do The Work.

Ready to start therapy?

Find a Best Therapists vetted therapist.

Find a therapist
Show sources and research articles